timlincecum-:

Why am I even watching this game? 

(via liam-i-would)

i think my plan for after college is

worb:

to work in a bridal shop in flushing, queens until my boyfriend kicks me out in one of those crushing scenes. what am i to do? where am i to go? i’ll be out on my fanny. so over the bridge from flushing to the sheffield’s door, i’ll be there to sell makeup but the father will see more. i have style, i have flair, i’ll be there, that’s how i’ll become the nanny.

(via veronica-wasboyski)

meanplastic:

"i’m so full…. do you want these nuggets?”

image

(via gnarly)

sealcat:

do you ever just listen to someone’s problem and you have nothing to say except “I’m sorry” because there is literally no way for you to help and you get sucked into a vortex of guilt and despair because you are useless 

(via brent-burns88)

  • me: i want to lose weight.
  • me: i want to be skinny.
  • me: i want skinny legs.
  • me: i want a flat stomach.
  • me: i want to be thin.
  • me: *sees Mcdonalds*
  • me: yolo
When that one friend who never has anything intelligent to say actually says something intelligent…

tumbloler:

(Source: shutyourface09, via heckyeahzaynmalik)

llieo:

holy fuck we have our windows open and we heard a blood curling scream so naturally I went to look out the window because wow is someone getting stabbed?? and it is just my neighbour on his knees staring at a KFC chicken bucket spilt all over his driveway

(Source: tansma, via trolllinginthedeep)